There are so many obstacles that weigh us down during the days. Often we are overwhelmed by the stresses of every day living whether it be our jobs, making ends meet, getting everyone where they need to be…managing our time and managing our conflicts, and well.. just catching our breath.
I have dwelt somewhat on the whole kit and caboodle lately. Mostly when my head hits the pillow and am supposed to be sleeping. More often than not.. the noise of the day or (clowns in my circus) are at full capacity. Doing their thing.. making too much noise and I lay awake trying to figure out who is going to tame the lions tomorrow? I become overwhelmed just watching the clowns running from one chaotic set to the next. Whoever coined the phrase “Send in the Clowns?” must have made their millions pushing sleep aids. Thankfully, a cuppa hot tea usually works for this old gal.
There are a few tricks up my sleeve on these kind of nights that do not involve my heavy tea drinking. It’s my battle against my own thought pattern, filling in the blanks….
At the end of the day __________________________________.
Focusing on the questions that I can manage – the ones I cannot? are not allowed to go into the empty spaces.
These are my questions I must answer every night.. yes. every night.
Did I learn anything
Did I make sure I said I love you to the people I live with.
How did I make others feel.
Did I make one person smile.
Did i offer/receive Grace – regardless of being worthy.
Did I retaliate with harsh words when i could have chosen to be quiet. (that’s a hard one!)
Did I say one encouraging word to my spouse/children
Did I spend this day regretting who I am or trying harder to be better than I was yesterday.
Did I make “home” a place where my family wants be most.
Honestly? These are the hard questions. Sometimes the list is shorter.. and even longer.
They are questions I don’t ask about my outside world, even my outside family and friends..they are the questions I have to ask about the people who live inside of these walls I call my home.
I had a wise friend tell me.. in the scheme of everyday living? I have to say to myself. “if it breathes? it matters” nothing more. If I can manage this part of my circle.. the rest will seem small in comparison.
Not my laundry.
Not my cluttered car
Not my social media realm
Not my busy to-do-list
My people. My inner circle. The people who breathe in my air space. That my friend, is enough to manage at the end of any persons day. It takes work. every single day.
It takes trying when you don’t feel like it.
It means doing the kind thing when you feel nothing but the beaten down ugliness of the day.
At the end of the day… if I can answer some of these questions with a good conscious? then I can manage the next day to come. If not, then I ask for one more day to try again…
It’s not about silencing the big clowns.. there will always be noise in that circus.. It’s about quieting the parts I can manage. Choices that I make every hour of the day. Moments I choose to diffuse or attempt to smooth.
It takes a lot of prayer for me also.. I need that most of all. Not the begging kind or complaining about my problems kind either. The kind that simply says.. Here I am, God.. You know. You see. You hear. Help me to do the right thing. It sounds simple? Probably one of the most effective simple things I have ever known – not because of who I am… but because of who He is. Simple.
Your first “At the end of the day” may start out a little rough and like me? you may come up a little short at times…but given enough conscious effort? It is an amazing process that gets you a little more zzzzz’s as an added bonus.
“Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” I Peter 5:7
And there’s always Grace that is new with each new day. Don’t leave home (or come home) without it!
At the end of the day ________.