And …. there it goes, 2014 will be history in a few short days. Regardless of how you reflect on the past year? It’s done. over. Kaput. Kapooey. Out the window. Gone.
So I say goodbye to some good times, now just part of my good memories held dear to my heart.
In order to move on to the New Year? there are some things that will not be allowed to travel with me. I am making a conscious choice in “letting it go” … you may want to read my disclaimer before continuing..
“Disclaimer…. This is my “whitespace” it always has been. It belongs to me… my thoughts.. my ideas.. my memories and my opinions. ” If you find it offensive, too opinionated? or even a little self-righteous? then this may be your cue to discontinue reading.. and that’s perfectly okay too. really.”
Now, getting back to “Letting it Go”….. (sorry, I know most of you are already singing the “Frozen” song LOL)
There are some things that I need to let go, simply because they are heavy, too heavy to carry around every day..I just end up exhausted.
There are the things that just simply make me sad. Sad to dwell on, sad to think will be different. It’s not… and it is .. what it is.
There are dead relationships… I had hoped for a resurrection.. but live things don’t keep a bad smell. Cause & Effect. and required my shovel.
There are grudges that I have let go 100% – 2015 is a new slate. What others do with theirs against me? is not up to me.. or my fault.
There are expectations that I will no longer set myself up for, but focus on what is real.. today real.
There are those that I will no longer make excuses for. Your deal.. not mine. – own your own mess.
There are those opinions of others about me… frankly, they are none of my business.
There are words I said to myself that needed to be in a trash can…yeah, I bagged those up and tossed them the other day. – yay me.
There are the hurts from my inner circle that ran deep. People live with scars everyday.. it’s a reminder that you survived, but more importantly, that you don’t want to be that kind of person..ever.
There are those friends that let me go. It’s okay.. Seasons change. People change.
There are things I didn’t accomplish in 2014.. regrets are not traveling into my new year. it’s over..gone. 2015 will have enough challenges all its own.
There are the days I thought I would just simply die of a broken heart.. but yet it still beats. (parenting isn’t for cowards)
There are those feelings that I had to own…check.
There are those feelings that I owned that didn’t even belong to me? had no business owning.. double-check.
As usual… I make no resolutions for the upcoming year. Yes, I had a few meltdowns in 2014, and I’m sure next year will have its own lot full of troubles? but I enter with an empty suitcase, room for some new things like treasures.. things that really matter.. not people or things that don’t. Sound a little selfish? maybe? but I have to own that too.
I have found that I am more of a survivor than I realized, more fragile in some areas than I thought, and way more determined than I imagined to make the most of what I have…